Mother who tried to kill her autistic daughter sentenced: 10 to 22 years

9 Oct

Isabelle Stapleton is an autistic teenager with extraordinary needs. She is also a teenager who will grow up without her mother, as her mother has been sentenced to 10 to 22 years for first degree child abuse. The mother was originally charged with murder, but she pled to the lesser child abuse charge. Details can be found at Mom who tried to kill daughter gets 10-22 years and Kelli Stapleton, who tried to kill autistic daughter, sentenced to minimum 10 years prison.

Here’s a quote from the prosecutor:

“My office strives to protect our most vulnerable victims,” she said. “In this case, Isabelle’s autism did not mean she deserved less protection. Her life has value, and she deserves justice for the attempt on her life. The right outcome was achieved in this case. The defendant was sentenced as recommended by our state’s sentencing guidelines, and justice was obtained for Isabelle.”

It is difficult to find words to discuss cases of murder and for me especially attempted murder of the disabled. As the parent of an autistic kid with very great challenges, this story affects me personally. The disabled are at a great risk of abuse–including from their caregivers. We can not excuse or diminish what Isabelle’s mother tried to do. What she did do. We do this because it is right, not because of loyalty to one group over another as many have described this.

Online one can find very active discussions about this case. Mrs. Stapleton’s friends have jumped forward to defend her. Others, possibly after seen “Dr. Phil” cover this story are also out there. Lot’s of people downplaying what this was–attempted murder. People using Isabelle’s disability to diminish the acts of her mother. People who see loyalty first not to the parents, but to the guilty. One can now find people attacking the father. Everyone is at fault…except the mother. The person who tried to kill Isabelle.

If loyalty is to come into play in this discussion, our first loyalty as parents is not to our fellow parents. Just as Isabelle’s mother’s first loyalty was to the protection of her daughter, ours is to the protection of our children and autistics like our children.

And for those who see great sympathy for fellow parents, consider this. How would you feel if your spouse killed or tried to kill you child? You want to feel loyalty to a parent, Isabelle’s father now has to raise a family alone. Isabelle’s siblings now have to grow up without a mother. It isn’t the court who took their mother away. It’s the mother who left them by her actions.

For those who think that by accepting that justice was served when Isabelle’s mother was sentenced we diminish the challenges of the mother: you are wrong. We can have the discussion of how difficult it is to be a parent. How difficult it is to be the parent of a disabled child. That conversation must start with the challenges and needs of the child. And what greater responsibility do we have than to protect our children’s lives?


By Matt Carey

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2 Responses to “Mother who tried to kill her autistic daughter sentenced: 10 to 22 years”

  1. jess October 20, 2014 at 21:52 #

    Amen. And thank you.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. What I’ve been reading – October 2014 | ASD Dad - November 3, 2014

    […] Mother who tried to kill her autistic daughter sentenced: 10 to 22 years. “We can have the discussion of how difficult it is to be a parent. How difficult it is to be the parent of a disabled child. That conversation must start with the challenges and needs of the child. And what greater responsibility do we have than to protect our children’s lives?” Read more […]

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