Mark Blaxill Thinks Bloggers Are Mean

4 Feb

Mark Blaxill, the token man of the mercury moms at SafeMinds, has written a lip-trembling post over on Age of Autism about how mean bloggers can be. Lets have a bit of fun with it shall we?

The rapid evolution of the Internet has created a host of fascinating, exhilarating and occasionally despicable new things. The Age of Autism is a blog and we’re proud to be a part of a new phenomenon called the blogosphere……But as one might expect with any new form of cultural expression, there’s a bizarre variant of the blogosphere out there. It’s a strange hybrid: it looks like a regular low end blog, based almost entirely on opinion, a dressed up version of the typical online discussion groups and chat rooms….In a disturbing way, this new hybrid has found its way into the debates and controversies around autism science…..Often connected with the so-called “neurodiversity” movement, many of these game players seem to define themselves by their own “autism”

So if I’m understanding Marky Mark, the blogosphere is a ‘new phenomenon’ upon which the light of the countenance of the Age of Autism has charitably fallen.

This ‘new phenomenon’ actually was first realised nine years ago Marky Mark. I await with bated breath Marky’s breathless announcement come 2017 that Age of Autism has discovered a ‘new phenomenon’ called Facebook. Truly the interweb is a wondrous thing. A piece of advice though Mark – never, ever type ‘Google’ into Google.

And these ‘low ends blogs’….my, my whomever could he be referring to? Surely not Autism Diva’s blog with a Google PR of 5 on the home page and over 1,150 Google backlinks to it? Or maybe Orac’s with a PR of 7 for the home page and which has over 6,100 Google backlinks to it? or maybe my own which has a PR 6 on the home page of the blog and over 2,700 Google backlinks to it.

Or maybe ‘low end’ might refer to a blog which has a PR of 3 on its home page and Google link operator can find no back link data for. I wonder, can anyone suggest a blog with user stats that low end?

Anyway, Marky Mark has a point to make and by god he’s eventually going to get around to making it dammit! Even if he has to rhetoricise our asses into verbal comas!!

But unlike people that engage in the blogosphere using their real names and identities, these avatars all have one thing in common.

They’re cowards.

Hmmmm, really? Is that why some people choose to blog anonymously?

I really hate to break this piece of news to Marky Mark but passing opinions online predates the web. Why go back to the old BBS’s and you’d find a whole bunch of people chatting away with (gasp!) fake names. In fact, I hear tell that some CB radio enthusiasts use fake names too!! The dirty cowards!

There’s a damn good reason why some people blog anonymously Marky Mark as I have good reason to know about – people who espouse similar views to you Marky Mark, target their children. People like John Best for example are very good reasons for preserving anonymity. Here’s what happens when one of his friends annoys him. What do you suppose he has in store for my child?

But who Marky Mark is really pouting about is Do’C and Interverbal, two bloggers who took the time out to look at a recent paper that Marky Mark was counting on to support his kook hypotheses. So annoyed by these two ‘low end’ bloggers (PR 5 on each of their blogs) that he elected to censor out the name of the blog they wrote at!

“Unfortunately, the main bloggers of [censored wackosphere site name] have taken the time to respond to almost all of the other blogs about this article

‘wackosphere’ (tee-hee!!) is the name Marky Mark has bestowed upon autism related blogs more popular than his it seems. That’s a lot of blogs.

So shocked was I at this blatant censorship that I nearly contacted the Ever So Important Editor on Age of Autism to ask if they would write a piece about this – after all they penned 10 blog entries last week decrying censorship – they must really hate it!

In fact so grasping does Marky Mark become that he actually says:

In fact, at a deeper level, there’s a widespread pattern of scientific intimidation and censorship underway in autism science that relies on a wide range of attack dogs…

Hey yeah – I know what you mean Marky Mark like what happened to Dr Paul Offit at the hands of the mercury militia:

….as Paul Offit, a vaccine expert who served on the committee, tried to make his way through the crowd, one of the protestors screamed at him through a megaphone: “The devil—it’s the devil!” One protester held a sign that read “TERRORIST” with a photo of Offit’s face. Just before Offit reached the door, a man dressed in a prison uniform grabbed Offit’s jacket. “It was harrowing,” Offit recalls.

….
He has since received hundreds of malicious and threatening emails, letters and phone calls accusing him of poisoning children and “selling out” to pharmaceutical companies. One phone caller listed the names of Offit’s two young children and the name of their school. One email contained a death threat—”I will hang you by your neck until you’re dead”—that Offit reported to federal investigators.

Or Paul Shattuck, also from the mercury militia:

One person said, “Don’t be surprised if you get a knock on your door in the middle of the night and I’ll be there.” Another message said it was easy in the age of the Internet to find out where people live.

Shattuck also had various utterly untrue allegations made about him by the NAA.

Or how about Arthur Allen and Professor Roy Grinker who have also been on the receiving end of threats of violence:

these people need to be horse whipped…

Or how about Ray Gallup, Director and co-founder of the Vaccine Autoimmune Project? here’s what he had to say recently:

Dear ****:

Since you seem to follow what is going on with the Leitch list let me know if Leitch, Deer and the others get hit with a fast moving truck or bus that leaves their carcasses mangled and bloodly on the street.

I will be devotely praying night and day that something like this happens to them and their followers. Especially since these creeps say such hurtful things to parents. They deserve all the best in something terrible happening to every last one of them and I will pray daily.

I usually pray for good things for families that suffer but in their case I will make a big exception.

Ray Gallup

Or what about this Marky Mark?

A-YEAR-and-a-half ago, a vaccines expert in the eastern US received a phone call at home. The man on the line did not identify himself; he simply stated the names and ages of the researcher’s two children and the schools they attended, then hung up. The threat was shocking, but not a surprise. “I get hate mail every day,” says the researcher, who asked not to be named.

Many vaccine scientists in the US have received similar threats in recent years. They are thought to come from a hard core of parents who, in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary, are convinced that small amounts of mercury in vaccines have made their children autistic. What’s more, they believe that researchers are complicit in the scandal.

How about what EoH member and mercury militia jackass Brian Hooker did to Dr Sarah Parker? He harasses her to the point her campus security services had to get involved and she sent this email to Hooker – which he proudly displayed online:

Date: Tue, 19 Apr 2005 14:03:17 -0600
From: Sarah Parker
Subject: Re: Sarah Parker on the show “To The Point”
To:
Cc:

I have received your phone messages (yesterday evening and today) and emails. I would like to inform you that due to your previous threat to me in November and the tone and content of these current calls and emails I consider these as threats/harassment as well and am documenting them with the campus police department. I respect your right to disagree and wish you would respect that same right with me. Please do not contact me again in the future.

Sarah Parker

How about Brad Handley of Generation rescue saying to me:

If we were on a rugby pitch, Kev, I’d put my boot in your eye and twist…

Marky Mark is quite right that there are wacko’s in the online autism community. All he has to do to find them is look to his left and right. He closes his diatribe with:

We need to defend some minimum standards for how people are permitted to participate in a public debate. At the top of the list of these standards should be this: if anyone wants to participate in a debate about autism, put your real self on the line: your real name, your actual body of work (if you have any) and your professional accomplishments and reputation. Put the things that really matter — your family’s future and your personal career prospects — out in public for everyone to see if you want to exercise the privilege of participation in civil society. If you’re willing to do that, then you have a right to be heard. If you’re not, then you should go back to your game and keep playing with yourself. Let serious people do serious work.

And he’s serious. He means it. How he:

a) Expects to set himself up as the arbiter of whats acceptable online and;
b) Expects people to be comfortable using their real names when he stands alongside the people listed above

I really can’t imagine. Believe me, if I’d known that pond scum like John Best shared a planet with me I would never have used my real identity. Its also quote clear that Mark Blaxills friends and colleagues hold no compunctions about besmirching reputations with groundless attacks and or threats of violence upon them or their children.

Look around you Marky Mark. That rarefied air you’re sucking down? Its the polluted air of the real wackosphere. A land where threats against children is fair game and where killers and paedophiles are welcomed in with no checks and open arms and the leaders of the many antivaccine kook organisations encourage and salivate after violence against anyone who disagrees with them.

Saint Stone of Kooks and the Removal of Gloves

2 Feb

The Eli Stone thing is very closely following the ‘fallout’ trajectory of the MMR/Wakefield program (Hear The Silence)over here a few years ago in that the protagonists were virtually canonised and the evil medicos painted as uncaring, duplicitous swine.

If the path of trajectory continues to be followed then Eli Stone’s canonisation should enjoy a brief, bright blaze followed by a long slow loss of interest from the general public and he will be relegated to one more point of disagreement that only matters to Age of Autism readers.

However, I do wonder if the Legal Editor at Age of Autism might be coming ever so slightly detached from reality:

Thanks to Eli Stone, our new patron saint of autism, we are no longer “Lost” to the mainstream media.

Well now I consulted my Reality Editor and they reminded me that Eli Stone is a fictional TV character. Maybe my Reality Editor needs to have a word with Age of Autism’s beloved Legal Editor. Then again, reality is not the strong suit of these guys.

Back in the real world:

Nancy J. Minshew is finally ready to take off the gloves.

After years of sitting back and hoping the science would speak for itself, the director of the University of Pittsburgh’s Center for Excellence in Autism Research has decided it’s time for her to take a personal stand.

Autism is not caused by vaccinations, she says, and those who continue to push that theory are endangering the lives of children and misdirecting the nation’s scarce resources for autism research.

“The weight of the evidence is so great that I don’t think there is any room for dispute. I think the issue is done,” said Minshew, who runs one of nine top autism research centers funded by the National Institutes of Health.

Good for her. Its about time the scientific establishment stopped leaving this up to one or two public figures like Paul Offit or Eric Fombonne and started addressing the issues in the real world.

The evolution of Eli Stone

1 Feb

This is a Guest Blogged piece written by new bloggers from Hollywood Spectrum.

For those who don’t know (I wish I were one of you), there is a TV show about to premiere called "Eli Stone". It was likely going to be a pretty run-of-the-mill premiere. Possibly, it was going to be a total non event.But, the plot includes autism. Not only does it include autism, but it involves a lawyer doing what has never happened in real life-he win’s a case about how mercury in vaccines caused autism in a child. This led to a number of news stories, internet discussions and blog posts.

Well, after the initial press on this, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) sent a letter to ABC/Disney asking them to pull the show since it could erode confidence in vaccines.  Somehow this was characterized as big-bad AAP trying to bully ABC/Disney.  Now, Disney is a company that has revenues of nearly $9B per quarter.  Yeah, AAP was twisting their arm by giving them free publicity.

Did anyone really believe that ABC/Disney would pull the show?  I mean, really, they just got a lot of free publicity for what was likely to be a pretty forgettable show.   How can I say this was going to be forgettable?  Because the original script was something worth forgetting.  Consider when Eli Stone visits a Chinese acupuncturist (who somehow brings about visions in Stone).  The good Dr. Chen was given such amazing lines in pigeon English as:

"You go regular doctor? Dr. Chen not MRI."

and

"I have patient, you come back half hour."

and

"No good hate dead people. Relah. Think good memory father. Dr. Chen help ungrateful son" 

OK, so, the dialogue was lame.  And, believe me, this isn’t the only example.  A whole blog post could be devoted to it, but this is an autism blog not a TV critic blog.  Maybe Dr. Chen is  supposed to be "comedy".  But, is it OK to stereotype for comedy?  If so, how about stereotyping (incorrectly) autism for drama.  Let’s look at how about the "autism" part of the script is portrayed. Here is their stage direction for the William character from the script:

William doesn’t smile. His autism doesn’t permit it.

What?!?  Autism "doesn’t permit" smiling?  So, people who smile aren’t autistic?  That should bring down the autism "epidemic"!  Just reject the diagnosis for all the people with autism who smile.  My guess is that it would be a pretty rare condition then. 

In the original script, the fight is with an insurance company who won’t pay for the treatments of the young "William", who is autistic.  The first mention of the word "autism" comes when the mother is describing this situation:

My son has autism. He needs Risperidone every day..

Whoa.  Was that about mercury?  Nope.  It’s about Risperidone.  Yep, instead of mercury causing autism, the story was about how the fictional kid needed an off-label prescription for an antipsychotic drug and the insurance company wouldn’t pay.

How does that jive with the writer’s idea of autism?  Well, the mother describes the value of Risperidone as:

After a month on the drug, he actually smiled.

For the record, Risperidone is pretty serious medication.  It has been shown to benefit some people with autism.  But, "smiling"?  I guess that scripts don’t need science advisor approval before being approved.

Somewhere between first and, let’s face it, lame final draft and premiere, the story shifted to vaccine/mercury caused autism.  A story line guaranteed to generate controversy.  A story line guaranteed to get publicity.

It’s too bad.  Yes, the reliance of the original script on Risperidone might have caused some consternation amongst the autism community.  Yes, the stereotype of the kid "whose autism prevents him from smiling" was lame at best, damaging at worst.  But, insurance coverage for autism is a big deal right now.  A good presentation of how insurance companies deny claims for autism could have actually helped people and families with autism.

Autisms Poor Excretors

31 Jan

Pediatrics released a study refuting the autism/thiomersal hypothesis early yesterday. They said that they did it to counter the upcoming Eli Stone pilot (of which there will be more to speak of soon). If that’s true then we need to thank the creators of Eli Stone for prompting the early release of more science debunking the anti-vaccine stance.

I don’t have this new study yet so I want you to bear in mind that I can only go on what’s in the news reports. This isn’t ideal but there are numerous quotes from the study authors over the news.

Basically, this study refutes the idea that autistic kids are poor excretors of mercury. Obviously, a lot of Hub bloggers have already taken this silliness apart but this is (IIRC) the first science paper to do so.

A proviso of this study would seem to be that it was done on NT kids rather than ASD kids but there’s no real scientifically valid reason to use ASD kids particularly anyway.

“….Now it’s obvious that ethyl mercury’s short half-life prevents toxic build-up from occurring. It’s just gone too fast,” Pichichero said.

To illustrate, researchers cite that infants in the 6-month-old group — who, in their lifetimes, had encountered more total ethyl mercury that any other group studied — still had the same pre-vaccination blood-mercury levels before their checkups as most 2-month-olds had before theirs. This suggests that, before each round of shots, the mercury has plenty of time to be cleared.

Source

Now, a group of people we all know are going to claim that the Burbacher et al showed that this was becuase the ethyl-mercury was going into the brain. This isn’t strictly accurate. Though total levels in the brain were lower for the thimerosal group, a higher ratio of inorganic mercury was noted. The anti-vaxxers tried to link this to Vargas because inorganic mercury is alleged to cause microglial activation.

But Burbacher detected no neuroinflammation. He should now know if there is neuroglial activation in his primates however. This paper was due some time ago but seems to be having trouble finding a publisher. Its pure speculation on my part that this would either be because his sponsors (SafeMinds) didn’t like the results and pulled the plug, or the science is bad and can’t find a journal to be published in.

Anyway, here’s this new paper that demonstrates that thiomersal is very quickly eliminated from the body. What is the typical mercury militia response to this?

And if it’s not thimerosal, then it must be some other vaccine-related interaction, said Barbara Loe Fisher, co-founder and president of the National Vaccine Information Center.

……

“Mercury doesn’t belong in any product,” Fisher added. “Mercury doesn’t belong in vaccines whether it’s proven or not proven that mercury is a problem in vaccines.”

You see? Its not even really about mercury to these geniuses. Its about vaccines. Always. Even when it isn’t. And when it is mercury it doesn’t matter if its actually dangerous or not. What a shame there’s no vaccine for stupidity.

Note: Bart Cubbins has done an excellent video on some of the shortcomings of the Burbacher study.

Ah, what the hell

30 Jan

It may be temporary, it may be less frequently updated but for now you can consider LB/RB open for business.

EDIT:

When I closed in October 2007 (well spotted Kristjan!) I got literally inundated with email expressing sorrow, frustration, remonstration that I was giving in and lots of warm wishes. I hope I managed to reply to everyone, if I didn’t then I apologise but it was (if you’ll excuse the self-referencing humour) manic. The day after I shut, I woke up to find GMail reporting 76 unread emails.

I was taken aback at how strongly people felt and immediately began to feel a bit guilty but I was convinced I was right to do it and I’m still not unconvinced 100%. I cannot let my kids become targets.

However, a few weeks ago a friend of mine who lives in the same town I do and who is also a manic depressive took it upon himself to become my ‘protector’ and started posting under a pseudonym to various blogs hostile to the stance of mine. Even now I still don’t know how many blogs he posted on. But anyway – the point of me telling you this was that it immediately started up again from ‘certain quarters’ (no prizes for guessing and no need to mention the blog or name in question) and I realised that it didn’t really matter if I was posting or not – it was still going to carry on.

With that in mind, the biggest reason for stopping seemed a bit pointless.

However, I’ll be honest, I’ve enjoyed not blogging. I won’t ever again get so caught up in it. It was nice to sit down and read a book for pleasure after the girls were in bed and so I intend to not lose that. It was nice not to have endless blah-blah wars with Brad Handley running into gajillions of comments so I’m going to be applying a very simple rule to comments: if they annoy me in any way I will simply delete them. If anyone doesn’t like that then boo-hoo. Get your own blog. My priority in doing this is my own peace of mind.

No more family mentions at all. Pics of the kids have been removed from Flickr. The videos of them are gone from YouTube. That’s a high price to pay, especially considering that one of those videos did one of the best things I could imagine – reached a man in need and helped him.

I’ve had a few questions reach me since yesterday. I’ll deal with them here:

1) What about the Group blogging?
Amanda (who is unavailable right now) has set up a fantastic resource called GreyMatter/White Matter which has all the LB/RB team bloggers on it. I am more than happy for bloggers to post here again if they want to but I would like to talk to Amanda first as GM/WM is her project.

2) Might you shut again soon?
I might, yeah. I really don’t know. I don’t want to. I enjoy writing and this grand old lady has been around for five years now but I have to have a bit of perspective. Its not up to me fight every battle going. Family, health, peace of mind, meals, then blogging.

So – lets get to it 🙂

From Mike McCarron to the Autism Hub

27 Jan

What follows is the text of an open letter, Mike McCarron, grandpa of Katie McCarron wishes to pass on to Autism Hub members.

An open letter to members of the Autism Hub.

I wish to thank each of you for your words; both about Katie and about people with special needs in general. In a world where differences easily become reasons to devalue people, your words have always conveyed respect, dignity and love for those with special needs.

I know that each of you from time to time question if you should express yourself and wonder if you are making a difference. Your opinions and descriptions of your travels in life have made a big difference to one grandfather and I suspect to many other parents.

In the days following my granddaughter’s death I was very upset. As I read comments from autism “advocates”, I moved from upset into anger. Many wanted to twist what happened to fit into their own agendas. All of you know the dialogue. I began to feel that all reason and common decency had been beaten out of society and replaced with hysterical and illogical screaming. Every time I would read some “advocate” say they could understand how a person could kill a child with autism I would bristle and await their self serving monologue of martyrdom. I even viewed a film clip that turned my stomach but it was receiving wide acclaim.

Then I encountered a different film, one of a little girl bouncing on a trampoline and I met Kevin. Next I found Kristina and the rest of your sites followed at different times mostly by reference from one of these two. During the extremely long trial process of twenty months I have visited your sites, some almost daily. Sometimes I would comment under a pseudonym but most of the time I just read and drew strength from your thoughts and your love. My interest in your posts varied by topic but I was always gratified and reassured by the love you expressed for your children and the respect shown for all people with differences.

I have had the pleasure of meeting some of you in person, I have corresponded with some of you, and still others I know only through your words on the internet. But words are so vitally important. The words used by some are frightening, intended solely for shock value, but are very divisive in the long term. Every time an “advocate” classifies autism as a fate worse than death they not only display the weakness of their own mind, but they do a terrible disservice to every autistic person. Your words and posts, firmly grounded in respect and love, foster the understanding needed for social movement toward improvement.

I sincerely hope that parents new to the autism community encounter the hub and your sites long before visiting many others. I find it strange to recommend sites that value human dignity; every site should, but too many don’t. That is what makes your sites so valuable. It seems that autism falls prey to every kind of con artist, they need to be exposed. It also seems that anything can be said about people with autism if the person saying it claims it was done to create awareness, they need to be set straight. Please continue to lead by example, do it as time permits but do what you can and what you already do so very well.

Sincerely,

Mike McCarron

Justice

18 Jan

Yesterday, the 12 jurors of Tazewell County returned a guilty verdict on all counts to the murderer of Katie McCarron.

Happiness is the wrong word for how I feel about this. I am glad for the McCarron’s that this aspect of their association with Karen McCarron is over and I am relieved that the jurors were so emphatic in their deliberations. One of the jurors, RH, commented on the trial at Kristina’s blog:

As a juror on the trial, I can say it was an exhausting, emotional, and mentally draining trial. In the end, the evidence was clar and the defense did virtually nothing to convince us that she was either insane or impaired by her depression, certainly not enough to warrant killing a child. A terrible tragedy on all fronts, but I left that trial knowing we made the right decision, and now hope the family can move on the best they can in the next phase of their lives.

We all hope that. It’s nigh on impossible to really know just how painful and draining this has been for the McCarron’s. All I can do is imagine (or try not to) how I would feel if one of my kids died. Hopefully, this day can be the first for along time that they can operate in a world that they know is free of their granddaughters killer and can know that justice for Katie has been done.

Paul made a public statement after the verdict:

If the measure of a person’s life could be quantified by the number of people that loved them, then Katie, in her brief 3 1/2 years, achieved well beyond all of us.

I’d like to recognize the tireless efforts and personal sacrifices of the States Attorney’s Office, specifically Kirk Schoenbein and Kevin Johnson, and the Morton Police Department, specifically Ray Ham and Bill Roth, for the relentless pursuit of the truth and justice. We are blessed to have these caring and professional people in our community.

I’d like to thank all the people that worked with Katie. Specifically, Kia Quick and Stephanie Blair—your ability to make Katie smile while you taught her is a testament to your talent and love.

I ask all parents and especially those of children with disabilities to ALWAYS love your children and be proud of them. Cherish every moment you have with them. Love, patience and tender efforts are the best therapies.

Speaking as the parent of an autistic child myself, I am also very grateful that the afore mentioned teachers, attorneys and police personnel were on hand to do right by Katie. It gives me hope in the idea that diversity can be respected and that crimes against people who are disabled are seen as exactly that, crimes. No watered down investigating and prosecuting because the victim was autistic.

I would remind people of the words Paul closed with ‘Love, patience and tender efforts are the best therapies’. Katie’s mum was part of a group that didn’t think that was so. They, Sue Grimm from ANSWERS, Erik Nanstiel and David Ayoub from Fair Autism Media amongst others, felt that Karen was a loving mum. David Ayoub attended Katie’s visitation and met a reporter there to expound on his vaccine hypothesis, describing Karen as ‘one of the most loving mom’s’ within a few feet of Katie’s body. Erik Nanstiel was considering inviting Karen to become a member of FAM. Sue Grimm testified on Karen’s behalf.

Justice has been done for Katie despite the best efforts of such persons. I hope that they can find some way to live with themselves and what they contributed to (not that I suggesting they played any role in Katie’s murder, that was all Karen). I hope they can stop the relentless mad drive to fix ‘imperfection’.

Raise the love, value patience. The life of Katie McCarron deserves no less.

Elsewhere

Dear Katie

16 Jan

As I write this, your Dad, Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle and Aunt are striving to bring you some justice. I don’t know yet what the jury will decide and I can only guess what trickery those who did you wrong may employ to wriggle out of their responsibilities.

However, I wanted to write you this letter as it occurred to me that although your picture sits on the bookshelf of our home, next to the photos of my own autistic daughter and although I have written about you from time to time I have never addressed a letter to you.

I wanted to tell you dear that I am so awfully sorry that I never got to meet you. Your Dad and your Grandpa came to see us and brought us some lovely photos of you. In all of them you were smiling and in all of them the adult with you – your Grandma, Grandpa or Dad – were smiling proudly. I can understand that Katie. You were obviously a little girl who anybody could be proud of. I hope to one day be able to tell you that when I can come and visit you where you’re resting now.

I also want you to know that your Daddy, your Grandma, your Grandpa, your Aunt and your Uncle and lots of your teachers spoke up for you sweetheart. They stood up to be counted and said that you were loved – adored – that the fact you were autistic should not ever be used as a justifiable reason for hurting anyone. They told the world what you were like. They wore pink ribbons to show the world that you were remembered. I wore my own pink ribbon everyday too.

One night, my own autistic little girl woke up about 3ish and we sat and I told her about you and about how much you were loved and how brave and steadfast your Daddy and your Grandma and your Grandpa were. Her favourite picture of you is the one where you are sitting on your Grandpa’s lap. I think it is her favourite as she remembers sitting on his lap when he and your Daddy came to visit. You are both little girls who see the purpose of a Grandpa!

Your Daddy is a hero Katie. A man who will not ever stop fighting for the rights of his daughter. A man who has stood opposite the person who wronged you so viciously, looked that person in the eye and remained dignified and composed. A man who has been buffeted from all sides and who simply misses his little girl and wants to do right by her. Your Daddy called me ‘pal’ and hugged me when he came over to see us. I am proud to be thought of as a friend by such a fine man as your Daddy.

The real tragedy is that any of this happened at all. There are no excuses for what was done to you. Whatever the verdict comes back as, the truth is that you were betrayed and snatched away from those who loved you. Those who wronged you – those with no answers – still try to wrong you. They blame vaccines. They blame autism. They blame mental illness. They look everywhere to place blame except where it deserves to be placed. In doing this they seek to cheapen and diminish the enormity of what was done to you. Your family will not let them.

Take care dear. I hope very much that one day I will be able to say some of this to you. I will bring you a toy from my girls and tie some pink ribbon around it. Until then please rest in the peace you so richly deserve. Your family continue to light a candle for your darkness.

Please Note: There is a living memorial for Katie should anyone wish to contribute.

Still Closed, but open to reference

27 Nov

As per the title. The comment form is disabled, no new posts will be forthcoming, but you can reference existing posts. The following is why this blog is and will remain closed:

This blog has been going now and in form or another for nearly five years. Its one the oldset autism related blogs on the web. Its charted and reflected my own beliefs as well as Megan’s progress.

Its been the scene of many a happy moment, many a funny moment and many a screaming flame war. None of that really mattered as it was between adults. Adults who all believed, despite their differences, that they were doing what they thought was right, even if we disagreed with each other sometimes.

One of the most personally life-altering events of my life has happened because of this blog. After my wedding and the birth of my children, I think meeting, befriending and spending time with the McCarron family after the killing of Katie was something that I will never forget. We continue to speak every week and I have spoken to Mike as I have spoken to Naomi, my wife, about this choice.

The reason LB/RB is shutting is because I cannot continue to allow my beautiful eldest girl to be exposed to the hatred and bullying she is recieving from John Best. John has seen fit to compare my beautiful child to a trained monkey because he didn’t like the fact she was progressing. He has made numerous jokes at her expense on that theme. He has assumed her identity online. He has encouraged others to do the same.

Let me be clear. I do not care one iota what this cowardly idiot thinks of me. He can write whatever he wants. But he has involved my daughter. Not to reference her progression. Not to quote me. But to laugh at her and to put words in her seven year old mouth.

I genuinely fear for her safety at the hands of this person (I will refrain from calling someone who picks on children ‘a man’). Three days running he has posted blog entries about her, two of which assume her identity and one of which is attempting to gain money in her name. I do not know where he would stop. Therefore the only way to make her safe is to remove us from his presence.

I am also relinquishing any and all control/ownership/admin rights over Autism Hub.

I would like to thank all of the many friends I have made via this blog over the last five years. You were a great support. I would like to urge you to keep up the fight. But maybe remain anonymous. Especially those of you with kids. The John Best’s of this world are more than ready to attack your children.

A small message also to those who are glad to see me go. Enjoy it. But ask yourself if attacking children – disabled children – is the right way to achieve this. Ask John some hard questions. Or don’t ask any questions. But next time you put your child to bed, look at their face and remember my Meg and how it wasn’t truth, science or accuracy that made me leave but one cowardly man who likes to laugh at autistic kids just like yours.

Lastly, many people contributed financially over the last month to LB/RB. I’m sorry your contribution was so short lived. I will make sure any spare money will be donated to a cause you would approve of.

The starting gun

10 Oct

One of my high school philosophy teachers (at a Jesuit high school here in St. Louis) used popular music of the time (70’s and early 80’s) as a tool in classes. I mostly remember using Supertramp (Crime of the Century) and some Pink Floyd (“Welcome to the Machine” was a favorite). No surprise, then, that this habit continues to today. Check out the pop-culture label at 29 Marbles for some of my earlier posts using pop-culture as the starting point.

I’ve been a Pink Floyd fan for a long time, and like any true Pink Floyd fan count The Dark Side of the Moon among my favorite albums, by anyone, of all time. The song “Time” is an excellent reflection of the fleeting nature of our time in this world. The second verse includes the following lyrics:

You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun.

These lyrics are quite literal, and it is not too difficult to catch the meaning. But I gained a bit more insight into these words, especially the last line, while watching a documentary of the making of the album (told 30 years after the fact).

In the documentary, Roger Waters talks about a teenage conversation with his mother and the realization that it was time for him to start living his own life, that the “starting gun” had fired. One of the most important jobs a parent has is preparing kids for life on their own (however you may define that), a life that they are in control of (to the extent that anyone is control of their own lives).

There is a somewhat well defined path that we typically, though not always, can follow with our normal (in the statistical sense) kids. And many of us have come up with our own ways of preparing our kids for what lies beyond childhood.

But how do we let our kids, especially our autistic kids, know that the starting gun has fired?

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